In today’s world, where social media and reality TV have become the norm, how other people live their lives and, more importantly, what life milestones they reach and ” We are constantly under fire for ticking off our “life achievements” list. The 20s and 30s are particularly intense, with the potential for enthusiastic engagement, pregnancy, and new home announcements to be intense and rapid, and those who haven’t reached these milestones experience anxiety, worry, and frustration. Experienced and worried about where I am or where I am in my life.So-called Milestone anxiety.
What is Milestone Anxiety?
Milestone anxiety disorder is not a diagnosable anxiety disorder, rather it is used by people to reach certain traditional life milestones such as finding a partner, climbing high on the career ladder, having children, or buying a home. It’s a term coined to describe the pressure that can be felt.. Not surprisingly, this pressure can have adverse health effects. According to a Relate survey (2022), the generations feeling the most pressure are millennials (defined in the survey as ages 25-39) and her Gen Z (ages 16-24), with a third (35 %)is. Percentage of millennials who feel the most pressure to have children.
Signs of Milestone Anxiety
- You worry or ruminate that you haven’t reached certain milestones in your life.
- Experiencing internal pressure to reach certain milestones may seem like a rule that doesn’t work.
- Feeling like you’re falling behind others your age: “Everyone else has a partner/has kids/knows what they want to do with their career”.
- Worry that people will judge you negatively or think badly of you.
- You don’t feel good because you haven’t reached a certain milestone.
- Being self-critical about not reaching certain milestones.
- Feeling hopeless about not reaching certain milestones: “I can’t find a partner/move out of my parents’ house”.
social background of life milestones
One way to capture life’s milestones is that they are socially constructed ideas that permeate social narratives and internalize them as achievements that must be achieved at a certain age. Of course, this applies to many socially accepted beliefs and norms, but it becomes a problem when they do not fit into our actual life experience. includes marriage, home ownership and the birth of children. But consider the socio-political and economic conditions we live in now.
Since 1972, heterosexual marriages have declined by 50% (ONS, 2022). Younger generations are less likely to own their own homes and more likely to rent compared to older generations (ONS, 2015). The age of women having their first child has risen steadily over the decades, with the average age of having a first child now at 31, compared with her 22 for those born in 1949. (ONS, 2019). In essence, we are achieving life milestones at an older age than previous generations. No wonder society ranks the adoption and exit of unhealthy relationships as the top milestone that society should recognize as important (Relate, 2022).
How to deal with milestone anxiety
If you’re worried that you haven’t reached a certain milestone in your life, here are some tips on how to deal with it.
- have a wider perspective — Traditional life milestones such as marriage and having children permeate our social narratives, You don’t necessarily have to agree with it. You can do it Choose What life goals do you want to pursue?Ask yourself: Which life milestones are important? myself?
- Identify what it means to not reach certain milestones — How we interpret or perceive things makes a difference in how we experience them.What does it mean if you are not yet married or have not purchased your first home? your failure, something you If it means you’ve done something wrong or that you’re not good enough compared to others, you’ll probably experience pain. Take a step back from this inner story—Consider how social behavior has changed over the years. We are having children later, renting longer, and marrying less. Society is changing and traditional milestones can be outdated and irrelevant.
- don’t compare yourself to others — Your Life Journey just for youWhen Excessive comparisons with those who perceive themselves to be “ahead” are useless And it doesn’t help you move forward as you wish.
- shift focus — Focus on the actual process of the journey rather than the goals, milestones and where you are on your life journey. essentially, Pay more attention to the here and now, be more present in your life and stop focusing on the “next thing”. Practicing mindfulness can help with this. If he’s new to mindfulness, he can start by incorporating mindful moments into his day.
- manage difficult thoughts — Notify, Label, Retreat From useless rules and worries.
- If you’re feeling anxious about reaching certain milestones in your life, you’re not alone.
- Our ideas of life’s achievements and milestones do not exist in isolation. They are socially constructed and reinforced by social narratives in social media and popular culture.
- Knowing this will help you identify important milestones in your life. you It’s based on your values and how you want to live your life.