In this week’s sleep diary, a 35-year-old senior graphic designer learns how to let go of the need to control sleep.
A little about me:
Year: 35
Profession: Senior Graphic Designer and Founder
Nightly sleep time: 5 to 8 range (randomly corrupted)
How many hours of sleep you want to get each night: 7-8 (consecutive)
Formally diagnosed sleep-related problems (insomnia/sleep apnea): number
Do you grind your teeth/have nightmares: No (and I hardly remember my dreams)
Amount of water you drink on average per day: i don’t know, i don’t care
How much caffeine do you drink on average per day? None
How much exercise do you do on average per week: about 180 minutes
First day
I canceled my gym session at 4:40am and managed to fall asleep by 7am. Homemade Pineapple He drinks two slices of toast with butter and jam for breakfast. I try to eat within 30 minutes of waking up.
At 6pm, I have an unusual dinner of crackers, cranberry cheese, and a glass of Vimto (the family eats together), and I exercise for 10 minutes before bath time.
I put my 3 1/2 year old to bed around 8pm. I started reading to her, but she fell asleep several times and she woke up saying, “Can you read?” I don’t know how long she slept, but it felt like a very deep sleep. A short nap gives me some energy and I keep reading until she goes to sleep, around 8:30pm.
I decided to go to bed right away without watching TV before 21:00. I fidget with my phone for a little while and I fall asleep quickly.
the 2nd day
At 1:37 am I was awakened by a dog whining and crying downstairs. I got up and told him to go to bed and then go back upstairs, but at 2:03am he was still awake. I’m having a hard time falling asleep, so I’m fiddling with my phone and thinking about my daughter’s birthday party, Wednesday’s therapy topic, and shopping list. Pass the time just tossing and turning.
At 3am the dog whined again, but was finally able to fall asleep again around 4am.
My daughter wakes me up at 7am. We all try to get some more sleep before finally waking up at 7:35am. My eyes are heavy and I’m exhausted from lack of sleep, but I have a boiled egg and a glass of pineapple juice for breakfast.
My stress levels are off the charts and the dog has damaged the house overnight. I try to take a nap around 4:30 PM, but I rest my eyes. I drank a lot of water today.
Dinner at 6:00 PM is steak and chips, followed by chocolate from Kinder Bar for dessert. Also around 9pm he has a bag of Cheetos and he drinks more water.
I go to bed around 9:30pm. I’m exhausted, but I’m basically tired. I fall asleep quickly.
Third day
You wake up at 5:27 am to go to gym class, even though your alarm is set for 5:50 am. I feel more rested and energetic today than yesterday.
After class, I have a boiled egg and a glass of apple juice for breakfast. I don’t drink much water throughout the day, especially compared to yesterday.
I put my daughter to bed around 8pm, but she falls asleep while doing her bedtime routine. Her daughter is asleep by 8:30pm, but after she falls asleep, she wakes up again at 8:45pm.
He returns to the living room, but his eyes are heavy and he can’t last long, and he falls asleep while watching TV. She goes to bed at 9:45 pm. I can’t keep my eyes open.
Day 4
My daughter wakes me up at 3:53 am, so we sleep together on the bed on the floor. It takes her a while to fall asleep again, but she is finally able to do so.
I head to the bathroom and get back to my bed at 6:15am. My eyes are heavy and I sleep soundly, and I wake up naturally at 7:01 am. Even if my sleep is interrupted, I don’t feel very tired.
Upset and depressed most of the day – too much going on in my head. I realized that I didn’t drink much water today.
After dinner, I wasn’t tired so I watched football and went upstairs to read a book in bed around 22:30. After 20 minutes he goes to sleep.
Day 5
I woke up with a sore throat at 1:52 am, but within 25 minutes I was back asleep. I wake up several times during the night, but every time I fall asleep quickly. I get out of bed at 6:12 am.
I’ve been feeling down for the last few days, so I write down my thoughts and cry a lot. I followed it with my life manager, which included removing leaves from my yard and installing fairy lights outside my house, and I finally felt a little better.
Just before dinner at 6:00 pm, I play tag with my daughter and dog outside, and when I go inside, I drink water. Then, eat pizza, garlic bread, and homemade lemonade.
Now it’s my turn to sleep. my daughter was great. She practiced cutting with plastic scissors. Beforehand, she showed us a lovely rainbow she had drawn and cut out around her. She puts it under her pillow and we cuddle until we fall asleep.
I woke up about 15 minutes later. The time is 8:45 PM. I still feel tired and when I go straight to bed I fall asleep right away. Finally, I had an uninterrupted night and woke up feeling energized and ready to hit the gym.
So what does that mean?Sleep Experts Share Their Thoughts
Dr. Nerina Ramlakan, sleep expert and specialist physiologist, said: “If you count the hours in your diary, 30 times! Here is one of the keys to sleep deprivation and glaring fatigue.
“When we are on our fatigue cycle, metaphorically speaking, when we are running behind the treadmill, we try to feel in control. We all find ourselves in those tight spots where we feel that if we control everything ‘the other side’, we might feel better ‘here’. Is this something you seek in therapy?
“To help her break the fatigue cycle, apply my five non-negotiables for a good night’s sleep for at least seven to ten days. Also, don’t check the time, especially if you wake up in the middle of the night.” Can you devise a way to
Dr Nerina continues: I would appreciate it if you could also use the affirmation, “Help me make more loving choices for myself today.”
“It doesn’t matter who you ask for help. The gift is in asking, and when help comes in, be open to noticing and receiving help, sometimes in subtle ways. Over time, it helps create a greater sense of inner safety, from which you can probably relax and go to sleep…and life.
“For more on these and other practices, check out my latest book. find inner safety”
Those who wish to participate stylistFor a sleep diary, email lauren.geall@stylist.co.uk with the subject line ‘SLEEP DIARIES’ and your age. We look forward to hearing from you.
Lead Image Design: Ami O’Callaghan
Other Pictures: Getty