Dear Abby: My two siblings and I were raised by an abusive and alcoholic father. Predictably, it took a toll on our mental health: one of her siblings struggles with alcoholism and substance abuse. The other has a personality disorder and cannot maintain stable relationships. I have relatively less serious issues to deal with, but I still have to work hard to maintain my marriage and career and raise healthy children. It’s not easy.
Problems with my siblings have disrupted my emotional health and family life. Other family members call me selfish and say I have a duty to help them because I am a “successful person.” We all survived the same toxic childhood, so I feel some guilt for not helping more.Frankly, people with alcoholics and personality disorders are difficult to get along with, even in a family. brother of
Dear Brother: Your number one priority should be your mental health. Next should be the well-being of your spouse and children and a career that allows you to provide for them. I call it selfishness. Help them out as much as you can, but don’t let other relatives on the sidelines twist your arm emotionally.
Dear Abby: I’ve lived in this apartment for almost ten years, and have the same downstairs neighbors since we moved. About three years ago I started noticing a strange smell coming from her apartment. It’s hard to describe other than the worst body odor imaginable. No matter how softly she puts it, she is not the type of person I can approach on this and I got to the point where I think she should file a complaint with management. It can be a hoarding situation, which can lead to health problems and pests.
I only have 4 units in my building, but my other 2 neighbors will never complain.Obviously it’s me and it would result in a very uncomfortable living situation. So far no one else I know has any advice so if you have any suggestions I’m desperate. — Tired of Oregon
Dear Disgust: Have you told other neighbors about this? Did they notice the smell too? If any of you answered yes, absolutely discuss with the building management company what is happening and how long it has been going on. There is a possibility that (Could it contain dead animals?) Don’t be silent. For everyone, this is a must checkout.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.Dear Abby Contact www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
